Learning Resilience from Lucy Hone

It took a little resilience for me to get to her, but the talk I heard from Lucy Hone at the Mayerson Academy’s Raising Positive Children Global Author Series was totally worth it.

I love going to the hair salon. I figured a great time to get my haircut would be between work and Lucy Hone’s talk. Everything was going smooth until the day wore on and I started losing momentum. I started toying with the idea of not going and instead just getting my hair done and going home.

I managed to get out of work on time – got to the salon early and started to pick up some energy sipping coffee and reading while I waited for my stylist. Time ticked by and eventually it was 45 minutes past my appointment time! My stylist would have to get me in and out of her chair in about 20 minutes in order for me to make it to Lucy Hone’s talk on resilience. I felt bad rushing my stylist, but explained that I had really been looking forward to this speaker because I had read a bit of Lucy’s bio and knew if anyone had something worthwhile to say about resilience Lucy Hone would.

Just saying it out loud helped me with my resolve to stick with the day’s plan. I arrived at the Mayerson Academy just as guests were moving from the reception to the auditorium. I found a seat and settled in to listen.

I knew right away that Lucy Hone knew about resilience. Some of the ideas that she expressed really resonated with me.

One, she understands that a person doesn’t actually have to be the one directly impacted to feel suffering and loss.

Two, she expressed the understanding that joy and grief can exist simultaneously.

Three, an event doesn’t have to be catastrophic for a person to feel grief & loss.

Four, (and my favorite) accept the good – meaning don’t let the loss ruin what is good in your life.

Five, people are more capable of being resilient than given credit for.

One line that I heard someone say over 10 years ago when I was on vacation in Denver, Colorado is, “Life is beautiful, but life is difficult.” Hearing that has helped me over the years since. I think it concisely captures Lucy Hone’s message on resilience.

If you don’t think you are resilient or think you have room to grow your resilience her message was clear on that too. She says resilience can:

  • can be influenced by how we react and think
  • can be taught
  • requires knowing yourself and acting deliberately
  • requires us to act and think flexibly
  • requires ordinary magic

She reinforces that resilience is about capacity. She recognizes struggle is a part of life and we all need compassion – from ourselves and from each other. She promotes accepting the good and hunting the good stuff if necessary.

I am almost through reading her book and highly recommend it. It sends a positive message of hope and gives many tips and strategies for getting through tough times.

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